What Matters in a Man?

A few months ago, a friend (Sara) and I were discussing what was important to us in a man. What we listed reflected what we considered important, and also reflected our personalities. This is what I ended up with…not comprehensive, I suppose, but it was fun to put together. Interestingly enough, many of the traits ended up similar to those of my father. Since I love and respect him, it makes sense that I would look for some of his traits in a future husband. Do men do the same things with their mothers? Do they look for what they consider important in their mothers in their future wives?

(side note: this list was not written in an attempt to purposefully match myself to any men I know, real or otherwise; coincidences are accidental.)


·         Male.  J

·         Christian.  Not merely “church-goer”; but a passionate, growing Christian. He doesn’t have to have it all “figured out” by any means, but he needs to be putting Christ at the center of his life.


Character—it what’s on the inside that counts:

·         Transparent, honest, open.  

·         Humble.

·         Willing to talk, willing to open his life to me.

·         Uncomplicated…understands what’s really important.

·         Serious when necessary.

·         Healthy sense of humor.

·         “Joie de vivre”. Joyful. Smiling.  Excited about life…not stiff, dry, negative, and grim. 

·         Servant Leader—a man that I can respect and follow.

·         Involved with the kids and my life


Other traits that attract me:

·         Material simplicity.

·         Conservative…fiscally, politically, etc.

·         Appreciates music/creativity

·         Thinks for himself; isn’t interested in copying the world or being “like everyone else”

·         Wants to eat my good cookin’ J

·         Gentlemanly actions—treats me like a lady.

·         Encourages me—makes me feel as if my ideas aren’t stupid, even when they need tweaking. I don’t want to feel attacked, doubted and analyzed for everything I do.

(And he’ll probably need a good deal of energy to keep up with me–haha! 🙂


In short, a down-to-earth man of God!

Published in: on March 9, 2009 at 4:32 pm  Comments (4)  

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4 CommentsLeave a comment

  1. Yeah!!! 🙂 What fun!
    Thanks for sharing!

    And it looks like I’ve got another blog post idea! Sweeeet! 😀

  2. To answer your first question…
    I dunno actually. I would tend to say no. Not sure guys are that deep. I suppose it would matter what type of mother/son relationship was experienced.

  3. I made a list like that when I was about 14. Mike is EVERYTHING on my list. No more. No less. The Lord knows who and what we need! 🙂

  4. Wow, I’m impressed how you already have a list down pat. Not that I haven’t thought about “Mr. Right.” So I’ve made a list in my mind of a couple characteristics that “Mr. Right” has to have. I’m sure if I had a whole note book, I my list would be a mile long! There are many particular features that would send me running in the opposite direction. One is the blunt feature of having long hair pass his shoulders. Another is if he is in a white and black striped outfit! That would be a little obvious. I’ll know when God lets the right man cut in!
    From Your Sister in Christ,


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